My Husband Had a Bipolar Episode

Hey, y'all --

My husband went into a bipolar episode yesterday, and I had no choice but to take him to the hospital. Sometimes I forget that not only do I have bipolar disorder, but so does he. I also forget that, as a supporter, I'm supposed to be watching for signs and symptoms in him, but I swear, I never saw this coming. Or maybe I did, but I just explained it away as other things. He just kept telling me he was fine, and I guess I just wanted to believe it so bad...

I didn't want to believe that my wonderful husband, my best friend, my soulmate, MY supporter, was having a bipolar episode of his own.

At first, I just felt lost, helpless, and very, very sacred, both for him and for me. I just didn't know what to do.

When I tried to talk to him about it that morning, I could tell he was no longer rational. He told me, "Why don't you just take your work to the library? This isn't Disneyland, you know." Then I knew he was truly in a deep bipolar episode, and I wasn't going to able to bring him out of it at home, or by myself. We needed help.

I realized then that I'm not God, or a psychiatrist, or a therapist. That no matter how much I loved him, love just wasn't going to be enough.

So I called his therapist, and she agreed that I should take him to the hospital. And I called his psychiatrist and left a message that he was in a bipolar episode and that I was taking him to the hospital. I made a list of my husband's symptoms that I had noticed over the past 3 days and a list of his medications with dosages and when he was supposed to take them, while I had him pack some clothes to take with him.

Then I took the lists, the clothes, and my husband to the hospital.

On the way there, he would alternate between agreeing it was the right thing to do and knowing he was in an episode...to being like a scared little boy, wondering what we were doing. So much so that, while at first I may have doubted my decision, I knew then that it was assuredly the right thing to do. My husband was sick, and he needed help.

The questions he was asked at the hospital only compounded his confusion further, and his diagnosis was confirmed. My husband was definitely in a bipolar episode.

I know he's in a safe place now. He'll get the sleep he needs (it turns out he was only sleeping 2-3 hours a night), and they'll adjust his medication so he can get better and come home soon.

I know, because when I had my last bipolar episode, that's where he took me.

Wishing you peace and stability,

Remember God loves you and so do I,
Michele