Bipolar Disorder and Coming Out of Our Shells
Hey, y'all --
This past weekend I finally came out from hiding behind this keyboard in my home and took a risk, coming out of my comfortable shell, driving to Chattanooga, and attending a weekend workshop sponsored by NAMI (the National Alliance on Mental Illness) to learn how to be a presenter for the In Our Own Voice program.
Wow. What an incredible weekend! The purpose was to learn how to tell our own story about mental illness, so then we could present it to other people (groups, consumers, civic organizations, etc.). But I never could have anticipated what it was really all about...
How could I possibly describe to you the feeling of being around so many other people just like me, who have been through the same suffering and pain, hiding behind closed doors, thinking that no one else would ever understand?
I met other people who not only had bipolar disorder, but other disorders along with it. And they've survived to tell the tale. They were such an inspiration to me!
One of the trainers has a website at: www.everyminute.org, about suicide, and I would recommend that every one of you check it out. It will blow your socks off, I'm telling you!
When I first got there, I was scared to death. I had no idea what to expect. But then, neither did anyone else, so I guess there was unity right from the start, because we were all in the same boat!
But as the weekend went on, it was like we were all brothers and sisters in the same family, which is what we were -- we all suffer from mental illness.
We learned how to tell our own stories as, the program says, "In Our Own Voice."
I would highly recommend that any of you that are interested in learning more about this program contact Lisa Corbin at Nami TN (if you're in TN), or NAMI nationally for more information. No matter how scared you are about telling your story, we all need to put a face on mental illness, so others can know that they're not alone.
I grew so much this past weekend. I thought I didn't have anything to say. Now I know that I do. People need to know that they're not the only ones struggling with their disorders. They need to know that recovery IS a possibility for them! And they need to know that there is HOPE most of all.
I remember when I thought there was no hope for me at all. Now look at me.
After 5 attempts at suicide, 5 failed marriages, countless jobs, 10 mental illnesses, and not just a broken brain, but a broken life...
I'm now full of life, happily married to a wonderful man who loves me very much, I've been writing for www.bipolarcentral.com for 3-1/2 yrs. now, I am stable from all my mental illnesses, and my life is so successful, productive, and happy... and I would never, ever think of killing myself again -- I have SO much to live for now!
And if I can do it, with so much going against me, you can too!
That's the message I have for you today. That recovery is possible. And it is possible for you. No matter how bad things look right now, they can get better. If it happened for me, it can happen for you, too.
Wishing you peace and stability,
Remember God loves you and so do I,
Michele
posted by Michele @ 6:02 AM
4 comments
4 Comments:
Allow me to respond. life is pretty purposeless at the moment. could'nt really care about the next moment or what the missus may have to say. sitting around now for two-and-half months not doing any much really since a friend and acquaintance of twenty years passed on, and boy, oh, how i was in this guy's life. now, what to do? been through so many jobs, and burnt so many bridges, what to do? the energy and focus levels vary. most of the time it's just not there. so ya, your blog is useful. it has allowed me to at leastpaste this. i wish myself luc, hardwork, energy and love to make things happen again. B.
I want to thank you for your comments. I have been training IOOV for the last few years and get so inspired to continue on afterwards knowing I have just extended my family in the end. It also lets me know that my other job (everyminute.org)has meaning. We need to find answers to this illness. We need to ease the pain and give back peoples lives in a timely manner. We need to find preventative measures and create proper treatments for the individual from the start. We can expedite the current guessing game that can take up to 10 years in the current system. Together we can make that happen. Until then we can only pray. Michael
B--
I'm so glad this blog was here for you to post on, for you to see that you're not the only one who feels the way you do. I've been where you are. I felt the same way when my sister, the twin of my heart, killed herself. It was the darkest day of my life. I kept thinking, "Why was it her, and not me?"
But now I understand that everyone has their time, and God has a purpose for everything. If I had died when *I* wanted to, I wouldn't be here writing to you and hopefully inspiring you to hang it there, that things WILL get better for you.
I burnt a lot of bridges, too, with all my drinking and drugging. I never thought my children would ever speak to me again, or ever want me in their lives. But my oldest, now, after 10 years, is wanting a relationship with me again. See? That quote about "the impossible just takes a little longer" can come true.
I never held a job longer than 6 months my whole life, and now I've been with bipolarcentral.com for 3-1/2 yrs. I never would have thought that possible.
The point is, that at my lowest times, when I couldn't even get out of bed, when I would go to bed at night and pray that God would just let me die so I could finally escape all the pain and suffering of my life... God did for me what I couldn't do for myself. He let me live.
And look at my life today. A life I never could have imagined. And if it happened for me, it really CAN happen for you, B. I really believe that.
Hang in there. It DOES get better. Even tho you may not be able to see thru the dark right now, the light is there somewhere.
Michele
Michele,
Thank you for your kind words about In Our Own Voice. This program truly grabbed my heart from the time Michael and I began to work on it. I enjoyed meeting you very much and I am so proud of the work you are doing for people like me. You and I are sisters in this journey. What you are doing is meaningful. Recovery is not only possible or probable...it is IMMINENT! I am still working on my recovery and I guess I will be for the rest of my life. But if it weren't like that, it wouldn't be a journey. what a long strange trip it's been!
Love ya,
L.
Post a Comment
<< Home