Post-Thanksgiving Let-Down
Hey, y'all--
This morning my 23-yr-old son popped in for a surprise visit, and I really enjoyed it. I have 3 sons -- 17, 23, and 25, so he is the middle son. He doesn't stop by that often, so when he does, it really makes me happy. I do more listening than talking, actually, and I always seem to learn so much from a "younger" point of view.
He has ADHD, so he does talk quite a bit as well! (went off his meds for ADHD a long time ago). But boy, was it nice to have him here. I love all my boys so much, but I love each of them "best" in their own ways. I love him best because he is my affectionate one, and I love him hugging me and telling me he loves me. Especially cuz it always seems to come at a time when I'm a little down and I really need that hug.
I'm not really depressed, but I'm not really NOT, either. Know what I mean? I mean, Thanksgiving can be such a "high" with all the build-up, family and shopping and all... and then after it, it can be such a let-down. Time seems to be going even faster this year than last year -- Christmas seems to be coming up faster. At least if you believe all the hype!
I usually do one craft show each year, the first Sat. in Dec. But this year I feel so apathetic about it, I don't know why. I just feel so uninspired, so unmotivated about it...I really don't even want to do this one show. I mean, I used to do so many shows, and they were how I earned my Christmas money every year. But now nobody does craft shows around here any more except for this one show now. So if I don't do it, how will I earn my Christmas money? At least that is the guilty thought I'm having. On the other hand, I don't want guilt to be my motivator, as there will be no "love" in my crafts then. See my dilemma?
And now my kids are saying that they are "cancelling Christmas" this year -- they have told me they aren't buying presents, they aren't putting up trees or decorating, and they have told me not to do the things I normally do, like decorate my house, get a tree & decorate it, put up their stockings (that I made when they were kids) & fill them for Christmas day, buy them all presents, etc. The thing is, me and hubby are feeling the same way -- like we want to "cancel Christmas" too. Isn't that strange? But I'm fighting this urge to cancel Christmas! Just like I'm fighting this urge not to do that one craft show!
I don't know, I'd like to believe it's because I don't want to lose the real meaning of Christmas. Or maybe it's because I'm feeling apathetic. I sure don't want to believe it's because I'm getting depressed because of the holidays. I'm just feeling wishy-washy, and in the meantime, that first Sat. in Dec. is getting closer and closer...
Some days I just don't wanna do ANYthing, ya know? I just want to grab a book, go in my room, throw the covers over me, and read all day. Is that depression? Or is that a "healthy" make the world go away day? Aren't I entitled to one?
Michele
posted by Michele @ 11:20 AM
2 comments
2 Comments:
A day in bed with a book is a WONDERFUL thing! As long as it is only a day. If it goes two days, you may be in trouble. Michele, by all means cancel Christmas! Or at least all the hectic parts. Maybe you could suggest that your family only cancel the presents, but still get together for a meal and some board games or singing - who knows how to play guitar? And maybe no tree, but a wreath to make the house smell good and hang half a dozen ornaments on. Just pick your favorite parts of the holiday, and toss out the rest! All that's important is the people you love, and none of them want you stressed out or depressed. If you're not buying presents, you don't need to do the craft show. See? Once again, life is good!
Affectionately,
Lizz58
Oh, Lizz --
You always know the right things to say, don't you? And your posts are so "on time," as well! I just called the craft show lady this morning and cancelled -- the show is tomorrow! There is just no way I could do it. I talked to hubby last night about it, and he agreed. I'll just put everything away for next year. It'll all still be there.
Ya know, with AA and all, I'm always trying to live one day at a time, and I didn't want to spend tomorrow's "one day" doing that craft show. There just wouldn't have been any "love" in it -- just alot of pressure. I'll get the money some other way. Like you say, no presents, no need for the craft show.
We decided just to get each of the kids a gift card from WalMart this year. Simple, no stress. No tree, less money to spend, and no stress on decorating. Unless I find that I feel like it, then we can go buy a tree and decorate it. But probably not. And usually I put up my whole "It's a Wonderful Life" village on top of the TV, but I've just gotten done getting the top of it done just the way I wanted it with the kids pictures and all, and I really don't want to take it down...oh, listen to me, babbling on with all the excuses NOT to decorate for Christmas!
I like what you said about picking out my favorite parts of the holiday and tossing out the rest. We can still have Christmas without a tree, and without elaborate presents.
You're also right on about the book. I spent the day in bed with the book yesterday, but today I feel so much better, wrote 3 articles, and now I'm writing on my blog! I guess I just needed that one day.
Anyway, thanks for writing and for such good advice!
Remember that God loves you and so do I!
Michele
Post a Comment
<< Home