Happy Valentines Day!

Hey, y'all!

Well, it's Valentines Day, so I'm feeling happy! I love holidays--any of them! But what woman could be depressed on the CHOCOLATE HOLIDAY!!!

But today is especially memorable for me. I have been feeling so sick lately--just really, really exhausted, for about a month now. I have been carrying this big secret within me, too afraid to let it out to anyone, and it has affected my work, my emotions, and my BP (afraid I was also going into another episode, because not sure if I was simply tired or depressed or both).

Here's the thing--I was tested for Hepatitis-C. Real scary stuff. BUT...I found out yesterday that I DON'T HAVE HEP-C !!!!!! (Thank you Jesus, Thank you God) Whew! I had it about 3 years ago (I had been an IV drug abuser who also had 8 tattoos, in case you can't tell by my profile picture!), went through the Interferon and Rebetol treatments for 6 mo. It was horrible. Hair fell out, etc. On a good day, I was able to get from the bed to the couch, where I proceeded to watch Lifetime Movie Channel until I went back to bed for the night. I didn't die (obviously), but it sure felt like I would, and at times (because of the depression) I sure wanted to. Point is, NOT an experience I would want to repeat.

It took two whole weeks for me to get the results of this Hep-C test. Two weeks of waiting, wondering...of worry, of depression, of crying... afraid to tell anyone what was wrong. A secret I was afraid to share with anyone. And so, so tired as well. So on the one hand NOT having Hep-C is such good news, but the bad news is--then what IS wrong with me???

My doctor is now testing me for thyroid problems. Same symptoms, etc. Plus the fact that I have gained 25 pounds since October? Yeah, truly. And I eat like a bird, my husband says. Well, except for the chocolate. But even he says there's no way I have eaten 25 pounds worth of chocolate! (Isn't he a wonderful husband?). So now I am waiting for the results of the thyroid test today. And on Valentines Day, too. The chocolate holiday!!! How could I possibly be expected to "diet" on the chocolate holiday????? And be this nervous about awaiting test results?

Well, I have to go now. There is a box of chocolates calling my name. I will keep you posted on the thyroid test.

Remember, God loves you and so do I!
Love, Michele