Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Bad Visit with Doctor

Hey, y'all --

Well, we went to see the neurosurgeon yesterday, and I don't know why, but this doctor was so mean to us. Me and hubby were both in tears, we really were by that time, and he was so cold and mean to us. We asked for painkillers for Bill till he could get the nerve block (the doctor said he wouldn't do it!), and the doc refused to give him ANYTHING for the pain! He treated Bill like a drug seeker (he has drug abuse in his past, but has been clean for 14 years and is a drug abuse counselor now).

Bill was crying, and asked, "Please help me," and the doctor just looked at him. Then said, "You can leave now, and at check-out they'll tell you when the anesthesiologist can do your nerve block." Guess when they can do the EMERGENCY nerve block? MAY 14th!!! With no relief from pain till then. I just can't believe a doctor would be that cruel. But you know how Dave talks about good doctors and bad doctors? I believe him now. It's just that both Bill and I have such good doctors for our bipolar disorder, we never expected this. It's almost like the bad doctors force you to the street for the meds you need. I never thought we'd find ourselves in tis position. We are so upset about this...and Bill is in such agony, not sleeping, not eating. And of course, neither can I, because he screams out in pain.

So I'm not sleeping, and my sleep cycle is off, so I'm concerned about an episode, which doesn't help anything. And I'm trying to take care of him, but nothing helps.

So all of you that prayed last week? Please double your prayers, that they'll take him sooner to do the nerve block. That's the only way he'll get out of pain.

Bless you all and may God help you with your own struggles.

Remember that God loves you and so do I,
Michele

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Need Prayers

Hey, y'all --

First of all, I am so thrilled that so many people are reading my blog now and are responding that I've been able to help them, because that's why I'm here. Someone had asked me if I always write encouraging things, and I had said that I try to, but I do balance it with the truth which, unfortunately, having BP, isn't always pretty. I have to be honest, so for example, I did tell y'all when I went thru that 3-week long depression. But then, I do get to tell you when things are good again!

Anyway, I'm writing today because my husband Bill needs prayer. He has BP, too, which is hard enough. But he's in excruciating pain from a nerve in the base of his head that flares up and spreads to the rest of his head, and right now they can't do anything for him. He's been clean for 14 years from substance abuse, so he can't take narcotics and they won't give him anything more for pain than 800 mg Ibuprofen, which isn't touching the pain, of course. And I just cry, because he keeps screaming out in pain.

This has been going on for 3 weeks. I've taken him to the Emergency Room and to the doctor twice. He has an "emergency" appointment scheduled with the neurosurgeon for one week from today -- they say it's the first appointment they could give him. The good news is that once he sees the neurosurgeon, he can schedule Bill for surgery to cut the nerve and Bill will instantly be out of pain, or give him a nerve block that day and accomplish the same thing.

The bad news is we have to wait another week while he suffers in pain. So I'm asking for prayer for him. If we all pray, God's gotta listen, huh? :)

Anyway, hope y'all are doing ok, and that the BP dragon isn't being too hard on you. Either way, write and let me know how you're doing.

Remember that God loves you and so do I,
Michele

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

A Perfect Day in Bipolar-ville

Hey, y'all --

Well, today is just a perfect day in Bipolar-ville. Any day that I'm not manic or depressed, actually, is a perfect day in Bipolar-ville!

It's like in AA, that any day I don't take a drink is a good day.

If I keep my expectations low enough, it's easy to exceed them! :)

These days, my life is so simple, it's peaceful, it's wonderful. I've gotten rid of all the busy-ness of it, and so it's pretty stress-free, which is how you have to make it if you want to keep the episodes away from knocking at your door.

At one point I thought I would always have episodes, with just a few days in between -- but basically my whole life would be filled with episode after episode after episode. That was really how my life was.

I had never heard of managing the disorder until I met Dave and found bipolarcentral.com. And he taught me that there are systems you can put in place, specific things you can actually learn that you can manage the disorder for yourself. Things that are NOT pills you have to take! Boy, was that a revelation for me!

So now I've learned them, have them in place, I've reduced the stress in my life, and for the most part, I live a very simple, very peaceful life. The point is, that you can too. If it worked for me, it can work for you. I'm nobody special. I've just learned to manage my bipolar disorder.

So, (thank you, Jesus), today is just another day in Paradise. Or, as I like to put it, another peaceful day in Bipolar-ville!

Hope y'all are doing ok. I'd love to hear from you, let me know how you're doing?

Remember that God loves you and so do I,
Michele